with the way cars are these days, that's unfortunately probably going to be the norm.

also, i bet you could get a simple reflash from turner/bimmerworld that would alleviate your problem for a few hundred bucks.
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There don't appear to be any off-the-shelf software kits that fix this particular problem. Why would there be? Standard stuff raises the rev limit, maybe remaps the timing ... certainly don't do anything with wheel-speed sensors, limp-home mode, etc.

It's going to have to be custom.